iMpatIence...

tOdae i was on the phone with her.. as usual, was trying to find out how she is egtting.. any progression from her wound and her feeling... wEll i realli dunno am i doin it right to ask her all these kinda question... but i jus wanna ask her becos i was concern abt her injuries.. been kinda long.. hEr reply was still the same.. "ok lor.. still the sme.. wat else u wan mi to say.. nothing new mahz..." she still is very impatient talkin to mi.. i realli dunno y is this so.. sIghz..

I'm tryin my best to make the best tone out of me and ask her nicely "am i making her feelin pissed?" or "is there anything i can do to make u happier then now??" what can i realli do to make her feels better then now? how tO let her talk to mi in a nicer tone.. and also i was trying to bring the topic away from her about stayin at my plc overnite which i nv bring up.. Guess wats the answer... "wEll i wanna go back home before 9.30pm okie.. cos i wanna go back home and watch the channel U show.. dun wanna bother u till so late. i dun wan to stay at ya plc for so long." at this moment, my heart jus sank even deeper.. she cares more abt the show rather then accompanying mi... It has been nearly a week that we had never meet up or so.. i was jus so eager to meet her tml and that the reply i got.. actualli wanan gif her a surprise tml in the early afternoon one.. but i am realli nt sure whether i wanna do that nw.. sIgh...

i wAs asking her if she wans to visit mi when she is better. she was tellin mi that weekday she got to study so cannot come.. will b busy.. fine... i take it.. but wat abt weekend?? u wanna come over and find mi?? tHe answer was.. "sEe how ba.. still far.."i realli dunno wat place am i in her heart.. How come everyday she will be telling mi over and over something that had already passed.. and talked thru.. i reali dunno what is she thinkin.. i tot she can forgive and forget about things easily.. but sadly, its in contrary.... i tried to talk nicely to her.. but all was in vain.. she neither wanna tell mi y is she still so angry or y her tone talkin to mi is so impatient.. i realli realli dunno.. i was talkin to her half way thru, she can tell mi to wait and start to play her console game while talkin to mi... i continued my chatting with her.. but all she reply was," so wat can i do.. wat to do..." it realli makes mi think am i someone so not impt to her that she can play and talk to mi at the same time... i jus felt very dejected and hopeless. even askin her over for dinner, she would prefer nt to come if there is an option....

y Am i having such a problem... aren't we tryin our best to understand one another and give in to each others? tEll each other how we are feeling? nt to hide anything... but iT seems like its not happen the way we had dictated when we first met.. i dun feel her loving mi as much as last time le... very much i would like to know all these are jus a dream and nv will happen.. we can live happily eva after... aM i juS to naive aBt wat our relationship realli is?? or i jus dun wanna accept all the happenin? i pray that her luv for mi is still as much as last time and we dun argue over wat our parents says... i pray for that..

i hope fOr a beTter tml..

需要你的爱

tIme realli fLies... its already April.. we haf been together for 4 mths plus le... and wE had a 2nd accident.. this time was worse for mi.... i had to gO thru 2 operations on my right leg due to the fracture and muscle tear... bUt it is after the accident.. i felt everything around mi is changing.. how she treats mi.. hOw she talk to mi, how she reply mi.. hmm somehow or rather is very different from last time when we first met.. She doesn't seems to be concern over my injuries and din even bother to ask mi abt it till i ask her y she nv ask abt my injuries progression...

i feLt like a lost sheep.. i reAlli dunno y our relationship has become somehow one-sided.. i felt she doesn't care abt mi as much as how she used to be.. probably is due to the fact that she is hafing some kinda depression or wat.. but she doesn't talk to mi as if i'm like the boyfren.. i felt she is talkin to mi more like an impatient person who wanna go do her stuff and jus skim thru the conversation with mi... I try my best nt to think in such a manner, but as always when i talk to her she felt impatient and most of the time is single word reply..

fOr the past 1 plus weeks i haf been talkin to myself.. am i thinkin too much into it.. or is she always like that.. but i dunno is it my own mindset or my own thoughts that she prefer to talk to her family rather then to mi.. always on the phone.. she seems to talk to her family in a much better tone then with mi.. as if i'm boring her with a lenghty and useless converstion.. tryin to put down the phone ASAP so hat she can go do her own stuff.. Watch tv rather then talkin to mi.. i realli felt vex abt this relationship... first time in my life i had encounter this... i realli luv her and want to perservere thru to see our future.. but now it seems to mi as very cloudy and stormy... Not like what we used to have.. clear and sunshine relationship.....

iS god punishing mi for having an unbalanced yolk... i hope its nt... i hope to bring her to salvation.. to god i pray in mighty jesus name.... :>

mY nEw rEsolUtIonS... ^_^

tOday is thE 8th day since the day oF my Accident.. well It was realli a moment then.. i only tot of Kelly on my bike.. is she ok.. is she in danger?? i was sooo worried.. time iS reAlli passing fASt.. my bike is now in the WrkShop and will onli be ready after CNY.. i hope thats a good sign and things like this will nv happen again.. i pray..

nEw yr is comin in and I am glad to haf someone to spend my holiday with mi... mY luv for her is growing more and more.. i jus felt that she is part of mi and i cannot do without her.. everyday and every nite.. i jus wan her to b with mi.. now tHat she is injured, i must take good care of her even more.. to prevent her from geting hurt again.. i miss her and i luv her... :> I hope that everything is goona be better as times goes by...

LoNg Day...

Wah.. it haf been a realli long long day.. flew to TaiwaN took ard 4 hrs and the moment we reached the Int'l AirPort, we took till like 1pm.. Then i rEalli miss my darling... SMS her when i reached taiwan but then i still felt that time is passing so slowly.. can't Wait fOr the time to pass super duper fast so that i can go back and accompany my dear dear.. Miss hEr sooo much.. Hearing from the in the tExt that she send mi, say that she was missing mi sooooo much. made mi felt soooo consoled and yet anxious.. cos time is passing so slow and she will miss mi even more.. i dun wanna torture her as such.. Baobei.. i miss ya soooo much.. will come back ASAP okok.. :> hugz and kisses... :>

TaiWan tAiwaN...

wow... been realli long since i last wrote theis blog.. hahha.. Usualli when i'm goin overseas then this blog will comes in useful.. lolx.. i rememer when i was in overseas studying, this blog is where i tell out all my stuff.. aha well i will try to update this blog as much as i can.. hahaha

Well this trip to taiwan i'm gonna miss my darling... cos she is goona be in singapore... :

But i will get stuff for u okie.. baobei... :> luv u lotsa and miss ya muchie much... :>

JJ here.. "Lucky man i am to haf ya"

gOoD Day....

wEll i guess.. in a werking environment, keeping yAself ocupied is bery impt.. i found out that i am such a lousy worker... nt even abt to keep myself awake most of the time.. arghz.. i guess i realli need to buck up in this area.. fElt s bad everytime i fell asleep... arghz...

I jus wanna train up myself.. and keep me self busy during work... :P

LifE haF tO Go oN...

HaD been a long day isn't it.. Finalli i can get to sit own in front of my desk nd type some stuff.. hahaha.. I realli thanx God For letting mi talk to my buddy.. after taLkin tO him.. i felt that we are not so distants anymore.. well he will only be back only aft next year.. so yalohz.. gotta realli awaits his coming back..

Sunday, had been good.. i heard good testimonies from one of my Church friend.. she is sooooo AWESOME!!!!! cAn't stop pRaising her.. and agree with her on stuff that we haf discuss during our lunchtime.. Well .. what she haf said, realli touches my heart and mAke mi ponder more on how i shld react to pple when at times God wants us to reach out to people that is unknown to us.. well It's realli realli a big BIG challenge to mi.. for i am not realli one who is able to reach out so well as some of my fellows peers in BriSsy.. But i will give it a Try when the chance arises.. ahha rEalli looking forward to read the book that she has written.. wanna get inspired by her and works towards a bEtter tomoRrow and reach out to the heLpless pple amids us...

God will be there always to guide us and teaches us when needed... Praise the Lord for the message u haf got her to convey to me.. will try my best to do it!!!!! :>